The Dance Floor is Not Your Therapist

How severe do your "lack-of-daddy's-love" issues need to be for you to act like a whorish kangaroo at a bar? Do you realize what you look like to the general crowd? I am a strong supporter of getting liquored up and cutting loose, but you miss, are just an eye sore for a blind man. Stop asking me to buy you shots, the drool coming from your mouth while you talk is unattractive and reminds me of a semi-sedated ostrich. If you cannot party responsibly, then don't party at all. And by responsibly, I am referring to the responsibility you have to your dignity - which you clearly whittle down to a sliver as soon as your lips touch the tequila bottle.

Even better is when you start shouting loudly for people to join you on the dance floor. At least you KNOW being alone and looking like a loser is shameful. If you keep twirling your head around you are going to break your neck, much like a giraffe would when he fights off other giraffes. If it is attention you are seeking, you got it. But the attention you are getting is about the same kind of attention a nurse would give to a paraplegic lesbian who's overdosed on Splenda.

Good luck to you in your future endeavors miss. Running into you last night truly was worth the three dollars I paid to get into the bar that you clearly have confused for a mosh pit.